My grandmother won’t be seen without her clip-on earrings. Doesn’t matter if she’s swimming in an ocean, having an operation at the hospital (long story), or just hanging by herself at home. She maintains that she’s always had long earlobes, doesn’t like them, and wants to cover them up with big, glamorous jewelry, which, in turn, has made them even longer, according to her. Because of this, I’ve had a mild fear of wearing chunky jewelry on my ears for basically my whole life.
Maybe because she was always wearing fabulous pieces while hiding those lobes, I’ve admired statement earrings forever. So, this year, I decided to tell my fear of heavy jewelry to eff off and went hard on all kinds of cute ones, long lobes be damned.
Love Cosmo? Want the mag? Subscribe here!
They’re just too pretty to ignore.
Guys, I’m so glad I made this choice—mostly because I immediately feel more polished and put together any time I wear cute statement earrings. Even if you’re just wearing jeans and a T-shirt, somehow people think you actually tried when you pair them with big ole’ hoops. Spoiler alert: All you really did was poke some posts through your ears and walk out the door!
Without fail, they always get you compliments.
Whenever I wear a new, dramatic pair, everyone notices them, because you can’t help it! They’re huge! They’re right by the face! They can’t be missed! So, to recap: Statement earrings make you the mayor of Compliment City.
Join me in my heavy earring epiphany, and shop the adorable statement looks below!
Get heavy, y’all!
Alright, but, like…was your grandma right?
Real quick, I feel like I do have to answer a few pressing questions that my grandmother’s perspective on these do-dads bring up.
Um, do heavy earrings actually stretch out your ears?
That would be a “yeah.” My grandma was spot on, unfortunately. If you wear statement earrings with real weight to them all the time, you can stretch your lobes, and you can also elongate the holes your earring backs poke into. The solve for this is to have a little variety in your jewelry box and switch up your style every day. You can also find dramatic pieces, like hoops, that are made from plastic over heavier metals so you can get the look without the dreaded pull effect.
Can I interest you in some lightweight statement pieces?
Are there weight-distribution devices out there?
Yes! A few products exist that will help you even out the pull of gravity. Levears are oblong earring backs that help give your dangly pieces extra lift. Lobe Wonder Ear Support Patches are small adhesive ovals that strengthen and support your lobes while you wear chunky items and keep your hole a nice little circle rather than a slash through your ear.
Check out these li’l ear savers, why dontcha?
Wait, can heavy earrings cause headaches?
Apparently that’s also a yes! Earrings (just like headbands or tight ponytails) can pull on connective tissue in the muscle groups around your scalp, which can mean headaches. If this happens to you often, it may be good to reserve your heaviest pieces for nights out, when you won’t be wearing them for quite as long.
Okay, let’s review.
Statement earrings are stunning, but let’s leave room for a healthy amount of apprehension if you don’t want your ears to hang low, wobble to and fro, etc., etc. Have a good mix of earring days vs. non-earring days, and lightweight pieces vs. heavier baubles. And if you’ve got some really pull-y pairs, reserve ’em for special events, when you know you won’t be wearing them for that long. Oh, and I guess if you don’t listen to any of that advice, you can just take a page from my Grammy’s book and wear glamorous, lobe-covering clip-ons for the rest of your life. It’s actually a pretty fabulous way to live.